ASSAULT/CRIMINAL MISCHIEF: Girls’ fight out | A meal at Chelsea Square Restaurant (368 W. 23rd St., at Ninth Ave.) transformed into a real “dine-’n-smash” kind of situation in the early morning hours of Sun., April 9. The problems began around 4:30am when, for reasons unclear, a fight broke out between three guests (all female) dining at the restaurant, who started fighting and smashing flower vases and drinking glasses — along with the diner’s front picture window. Perhaps foolheartedly, a 38-year-old Washington, DC man, heretofore entirely uninvolved with the situation, attempted to intervene and de-escalate the altercation. He was promptly shut down, however, when one of the women chucked a glass jar candle at his face, causing substantial bruising, swelling, and pain. Soon thereafter the assailant — a 25-year-old woman from Arizona — was arrested for assault and criminal mischief. The two other women (one 25 and from Manhattan, the other 31 and from upstate) were also arrested for criminal mischief. The damage they caused exceeded $1,000.
LEAVING THE SCENE OF PROPERTY DAMAGE: Parking pushback | On Sun., April 9, a Brooklyn man parked his gray 2007 Saturn sedan on the 500 block of W. 21st St. (btw. 10th & 11th Aves.). When he returned to the parking spot at about 4am, he found it damaged — and a short distance from where he left it. Judging by the tire treads on the ground, it seems another vehicle collided with it, causing front-end damage to the car, and making it slide backwards into a rolling gate at 521 W. 21st St. (which also sustained damage). A canvas was conducted, but yielded negative results.
HARASSMENT: Pharmacy phreakout | In lieu of receiving “service with a smile” at a Duane Reade (455 W. 37th St., btw. Ninth & 10th Aves.), one man took the less-traveled route of getting “service with a police report.” According to an employee, a man walked into the store at around 11:35am on Fri., April 7, and, after taking some merchandise off of a shelf, proceeded to berate the employee for no particular reason. “I am going to f**k you up,” the man proclaimed, amongst other profanities he yelled during the argument. Though eventually he left — without taking anything illicitly — and was not arrested, the encounter still caused the 64-year-old Brooklyn worker enough annoyance and alarm for her to file a police report in case he returns.
CRIMINAL POSSESSION OF A CONTROLLED SUBSTANCE | Obstinate incontinence | At about 4pm on Sat., April 8, police observed a man urinating out in the open, in front of 511 W. 35th St. (btw. 10th & 11th Sts.). As soon as officers approached the man, he started to run, though he was soon apprehended — at which point he refused to put his hands behind his back and flailed his arms about. A search revealed why the 31-year-old was so cagey: There was a crack pipe with alleged crack residue inside his rear pocket, which he was promptly arrested for.
IDENTITY THEFT: Amazon Crime | Most moochers simply swipe a friend or relative’s password to gain access to streaming services — but in this case, an unknown party decided to up the ante by stealing identities to facilitate their high-tech couch surfing. As reported to police on Fri., April 7, a W. 19th St. resident said that he had been charged $47.88 for an Amazon Prime account that was opened using his credit card information in Dec. 2016 without his permission or authority to do so. Further compounding the issue is the fact that a relative of his — a 31-year-old woman living on W. 16th St. — also had an Amazon Prime account opened in her name with her info without permission. Thus far, there are no leads in this case.
—SEAN EGAN
THE 10th PRECINCT: Located at 230 W. 20th St. (btw. Seventh & Eighth Aves.). Commander: Capt. Paul Lanot. Main number: 212-741-8211. Community Affairs: 212-741-8226. Crime Prevention: 212-741-8226. Domestic Violence: 212-741-8216. Youth Officer: 212-741-8211. Auxiliary Coordinator: 212-924-3377. Detective Squad: 212-741-8245. The Community Council meets on the last Wed. of the month, 7pm, at the 10th Precinct or other locations to be announced.
MIDTOWN SOUTH PRECINCT: Located at 357 W. 35th St. (btw. Eighth & Ninth Aves.). Inspector: Russel J. Green. Call 212-239-9811. Community Affairs: 212-239-9846. Crime Prevention: 212-239-9846. Domestic Violence: 212-239-9863. Youth Officer: 212-239-9817. Auxiliary Coordinator: 212-239-9836. Detective Squad: 212-239-9856. The Community Council meets on the third Thurs. of the month, 7pm, at the New Yorker Hotel (481 Eighth Ave., btw. W. 34th & W. 35th St.). Visit midtownsouthcc.org.
THE 13th PRECINCT: Located at 230 E. 21st St. (btw. Second & Third Aves.). Deputy Inspector: Brendan Timoney. Call 212-477-7411. Community Affairs: 212-477-7427. Crime Prevention: 212-477-7427. Domestic Violence: 212-477-3863. Youth Officer: 212-477-7411. Auxiliary Coordinator: 212-477-4380. Detective Squad: 212-477-7444. The Community Council meets on the third Tues. of the month, 6:30pm, at the 13th Precinct.
CASH FOR GUNS | $100 cash will be given (no questions asked) for each handgun, assault weapon or sawed-off shotgun, up to a maximum payment of $300. Guns are accepted at any Police Precinct, PSA or Transit District.
