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Don’t be afraid to scare yourself

MC Stiffie the Clown and a devilish playmate welcome you to Live Mag’s Monster Word Mash (Oct. 27 at La MaMa).   Photo by Patricia Carragon
MC Stiffie the Clown and a devilish playmate welcome you to Live Mag’s Monster Word Mash (Oct. 27 at La MaMa). Photo by Patricia Carragon

BY SCOTT STIFFLER  |  LIVE MAG! MONSTER WORD MASH  |  It may be sick in bed, but rumors of the print medium’s death have been greatly exaggerated — and in a Frankensteinian experiment meant to keep changing times from storming its castle, Live Magazine did the mash. “Live Mag!” is a performance event that coincides with each freshly minted print edition. To celebrate its seventh year (and eleventh issue), Oct. 27’s “Monster Word Mash” has a rowdy troupe of poets, artists, and musicians corrupting The Club at La Mama with their unholy marriage of the page and the stage.

Drink, get down and boogie oogie oogie until you just can’t boogie no more (music by Demetrius Daniel). During brief respites from the dancefloor debauchery, enjoy art by Loopster Dianne Bowen and readings from Michael Lally, Filip Marinovich (the “Wolfman” Librarian of OWS), Uche Nduka, Nava Renek, Ilka Scobie, Emily Skillings, and more. Stiffy the clown (aka Jeff Wright) hosts. Prizes awarded to those in costume. Every guy, girl and ghoul will get a complimentary issue of Live MAG! No. 11 — whose contributors include Gary Indiana and Jane LeCroy (poetry) and George Hirose (“Magic Gardens: Night Photographs from the East Village and Lower East Side Community Gardens”).

Mon., Oct. 27, 8–10 p.m. at The Club at La MaMa (74 E. Fourth St. btw. Bowery & Second Ave.). Admission: $10 ($8 for seniors). For more info, visit livemag.org.

The dapper and daring John Grimaldi works his magic, at Theater for the New City’s annual Halloween extravaganza.   Photo by Lee Wexler
The dapper and daring John Grimaldi works his magic, at Theater for the New City’s annual Halloween extravaganza. Photo by Lee Wexler

THEATER FOR THE NEW CITY’S 38th ANNUAL VILLAGE HALLOWEEN COSTUME BALL
If you find yourself freaked out by the six-deep Village Halloween Parade crowds, the best alternative celebration always takes place at the Theater for the New City — where superheroes, zombies, vampires, pirates, witches, formal wear swells, and scary-good artists gather for a bewitching night that celebrates creativity and rewards innovation. The fiendish fiesta takes over all four of TNC’s theater spaces, plus its lobby and the block of E. 10th St., btw. First & Second Aves.

Halloween happenings to frighten, scar and even enlighten

Entertainment includes dance music from the Hot Lavender Swing Band (a gay and lesbian 18-piece orchestra), aerial dance by Suspended Cirque, and performances from tons of Downtown underground royalty (including Epstein and Hassan, Penny Arcade, Trav S.D. and Tammy Faye Starlite as Nico). In the basement, David Zen Mansley’s House of Horrors maze has a possession and madness theme — and outside, the barely controlled chaos offers free entertainment from R&B and Dixieland bands, fire-eaters, jugglers, storyweavers, and stilt dancers. The Cino Theater is transformed into a Withes’ Cauldron cafe, where the buffet offerings include American and international delicacies by neighboring East Village restaurants and couscous from a coffin lid. The fiercely competitive Costume Competition, which rewards winners with one-year passes to TNC and a bottle of Moet & Chandon champagne, includes categories for “Most Hydrofracked,” “Most Beheaded,” “Most Corrupted” and “Most Global-Warmed.”

Fri., Oct. 31, at Theater for the New City (155 First Ave. at E. 10th St.) and the block of E. 10th St. btw. First & Second Aves. Free outdoor entertainment starting at 4:30 p.m. Doors open at 7:30 p.m. with indoor entertainment at 8 p.m. via continuously running cabarets. Admission: $20. Costume or formal wear required. The food and drink is graveyard-dirt-cheap. Reservations are strongly recommended. For info, call 212-254-1109 or visit theaterforthenewcity.net.

Cruise ship passengers circle their wagons and lose their marbles, in “Seasick” — a tale of disease on the high seas.   Photo by KL Thomas
Cruise ship passengers circle their wagons and lose their marbles, in “Seasick” — a tale of disease on the high seas. Photo by KL Thomas

THE PUMPKIN PIE SHOW in “SEASICK”
First they float your boat, then they deck you one. Upon navigating your way down the staircase to UNDER St. Marks theater, you’re warmly greeted by the ship’s captain, then welcomed to a Bon Voyage party where everyone gets a colorful lei and the chance to join the cast as they joyfully bop, sing along and even play spoons to seafaring pop hits like “The Piña Colada Song” and “Kokomo.” Then the luxury cruise liner leaves port, a virus spreads and it’s every paranoid, puking, and hallucinating passenger for themselves.

Authored by Clay McLeod Chapman — who never met a car trunk he didn’t want to stuff a body into — “Seasick” is the latest incarnation of The Pumpkin Pie Show, whose roots in campfire story one-upsmanship makes for a crackling night of theater where the pace is fast, the stakes are high and the disturbing images have eternal staying power. This year, they’ve outdone themselves by ruining our pleasant associations with buffet dining, karaoke, shuffleboard and the notion of safety in numbers. Physically nimble and vocally intense throughout, the hypnotically watchable Hanna Cheek, Abe Goldfarb, Katie Hartman and Brian Silliman pull double duty on the good ship Argonautica by giving life (and perhaps death) to the vacationing Pendleton family as well as a handful of remaining crew members. Each individual responds to the rapidly spreading norovirus with varying degrees of unexpected heroism and villainy. Playing a captain spooked by past failures, Chapman tries to lead by example but only succeeds in setting the bar for one-way trips to madness. Haunted houses and slasher films may provide a faster way to go to hell this Halloween — but for those looking to drown themselves in dark waters, nothing beats “Seasick.”

Through Nov. 1. Thurs.–Sat. at 8 p.m. At UNDER St. Marks (94 St. Marks Pl., btw. First Ave. & Ave. A). For tickets ($18, $15 for students/seniors), call 888-596-1027 or visit horsetrade.info. For artist info: claymcleodchapman.com.

Mourners cross Great Jones St., en route to bury Seabury Tredwell. The 1865 funeral reenactment begins at 4 p.m. on Oct. 26, at Merchant’s House Museum.   Photo by Gardiner Anderson
Mourners cross Great Jones St., en route to bury Seabury Tredwell. The 1865 funeral reenactment begins at 4 p.m. on Oct. 26, at Merchant’s House Museum. Photo by Gardiner Anderson

GHOST TOURS AND SPIRITED EVENTS AT MERCHANT’S  HOUSE MUSEUM
At Merchant’s House Museum, every room is a door to the past — and maybe, a portal to the afterlife. Now celebrating its 78th year as a museum, the meticulously preserved East Fourth Street row house has enjoyed a longer life than most of the Tredwell family members and servants who lived there over a nearly 100-year period. Some say they never left — and can back up that claim with compelling (often identical) tales of unexplained sights and sounds. Years ago, mounting anecdotal evidence compelled museum caretakers to begin documenting every strange encounter. Merchant’s House is now one of the world’s most carefully and consistently investigated homes to paranormal activity — and one of the few that you can walk through five days a week. For the next two weeks, that walk guarantees some goosebumps along with its usual history lesson about life in the mid-1800s.

Filled with creepy photos, unsettling audio and first-person accounts of unsettling encounters with the unexplained, these annual Candlelight Ghost Tours have a way of making believers out of skeptics. Other events include Oct. 26’s 4 p.m. “Parlor to Grave: 1865 Funeral Reenactment and Graveyard Procession.” It begins in the Museum’s double Greek revival parlors, as they discuss the funerary customs of 19th century New York City and recreate the 1865 funeral service of family patriarch Seabury Tredwell. Then, mourners follow the coffin to nearby Marble Cemetery for the graveside service and a cemetery talk. 19th century mourning attire is encouraged ($40, $55 VIP Seats). On Halloween night “Tales of the Supernatural” ($25) are told at both 7 and 8:30 p.m. Veteran associates of the House will perform dramatic readings from 19th century Gothic literature and tell true ghost stories as reported by Merchant’s House visitors through the years. Reservations are highly recommended for all of these events.

The 50-minute Candlelight Ghost Tours are on Oct. 24 & 25 and Oct. 28–30 ($25 for week 1, $30 for week 2). They begin every half hour from 6:30 to 9:30 p.m., with a few kid-friendly versions available. Super-spooky version (including fourth floor servants’ quarters) is $35 for week 1 and $40 for week 2. Call 212-777-1089 or visit merchantshouse.org. At Merchant’s House Museum (29 E. Fourth St., btw. Lafayette & Bowery). Regular Museum hours: Thurs.–Mon., noon to 5 p.m. Admission: $10, $5 for students & seniors, free under 12). Become a Museum member and get discounts on all events, year-round.

Set sail for dark waters, without ever leaving Pier 66.
Set sail for dark waters, without ever leaving Pier 66.

HALLOWEEN ONBOARD THE GHOSTSHIP FRYING PAN
Built in 1929, United States Lightship #115 is now enjoying life as the Lightship Frying Pan (open to the public for free during the hours of Pier 66 Maritime Bar & Grill). For one terrifying night only, though, the good ship becomes a ghost ship — when a $15 ticket grants you access to a Halloween celebration that includes a complimentary beverage, ghoulish goodies and tricky treats. DJ Bryan Black will spin spooky beats as you shake the barnacles off the boat by dancing the night away in the ship’s belly.

At 7 p.m. on Fri., Oct. 31. The Lightship Frying Pan (aka the Ghostship Frying Pan) is docked at Pier 66 in Hudson River Park (W. 26th St. entry). For tickets ($15), visit fryingpan.com. Festive attire suggested, valid state or gov. ID required.